Our last day

Tomorrow evening 8pm we fly out. Some 26 hours of flying, 5hrs in Singapore and 2 hours of driving later, we will be on the doorstep of home, eagerly awaiting two little men's arms and cuddles and excited voices. And this time here will feel like a dream, for both Sam and I. What a precious amazing time it's been. Today I raced out early again to frinton village to find a few things I really wanted to bring home, and most importantly visit Bambi, the sweet shop. The owner has been there forever, so I took a photo of the kids with him, and picked up the rhubarb and custard sweets which I plan to sell to high price to my uk friends back home ;) We drove on to beach hut 365 to catch up albeit briefly with Sarah Johnstone. Loved actually being inside a beach hut, and was so lovely to meet her. She brought a photo album of memory lane, which I loved as much as Sam. Some of the photos I've seen before, but when you can place them in a setting you've seen, and smelt the smells, it's like it becomes real. Sometimes I realise how much I've adopted the English culture and how much Sam has adopted mine. Strangely, I feel at times more home here. Subtle differences but I wonder at times how much my European .. English/ Estonian ancestory impacts my innate sense of cultural norm, or how much being married to Sam has shaped it. Sam on the other hand fairly grieved the America cup loss and followed it faithfully while here, the impact of it causing him to realise how very Kiwi he is. We drove straight to Nans house so Sam could have one final look through, probably the last time ever. Took video and photos and then drove to kings cliff for Nans official birthday lunch. It was a small affair and lovely. Sam had time to sit and talk to nan to try and dig into her memories and make some connections between the stranger he seems to her now, and the little lad she knew. All conversations start with "it's Sam, Derek's son" and slowly work backwards. Some moments were hilarious such as when Sam said "do you remember i used to mow your lawn every Saturday and she gave him this delighted look like 'how very nice of you young man, whoever you are, to do that'. Eventually she remembered Sam as a little baby with his twin sister Becky in the pram. But beyond that, the memories are locked away. I was glad to be behind the camera, blinking back my tears. Dear Nan, thank you for the love and prayers you poured into Sam, the currant cookies and soup and meals you fed him, the way you encouraged him. I remember you telling me how you would read my letters about being married to Sam and you loved how much you could see I adored being married to him. Nan, Sam is a treasure and you are a Godly jewel in his genealogy. God has blessed you with long life, and although your memory now fails, we remember for you the precious sweetness of your life. Old age has stripped from you the ability to recall facts and faces, strength in your body and weight from your bones, but dear lady, you are beautiful. Elegant. Graceful. What is left of you remains the loveliness God has shaped. I love you Nan. Happy 100th birthday!! Sam kissed her goodbye and stood for a moment at the door beholding her, knowing this will be the last time he will see her. It was hard but with her failing memory, it felt like goodbye had happened already.. And what we werevsaying goodbye to was a beautiful fading shell. Went straight to Dan and Clare's which is like stepping into 'home'. We all went to the local pub for tea where Sam caught up also with his friends Ben and johnny. Sams out hanging with Dan while I pack up and the kids sleep. God, thank you for this incredible incredible trip.

These are a few of my favourite things..

It's 10:40pm here. We've not long been home. Sam was climbing into bed and then decided he was missing his best mate Dan, and why not drive over and keep him awake and laugh together, just because he can. I love that he has a best buddy who is someone so, well, solid. Dan is constant, loyal, gentle and funny. I wish we lived closer!! We started today at Frinton Free church, where the Cahill family used to attend. I was attending with an element of quiet anticipation, mostly because I knew Jesus wanted to minister to me. The message was on 2 Samuel 13 and I have to admit to being extremely curious to how god had anything in this or me...but he did... I guess I could define it as stained honour versus un stained virtue. God may allow us to walk through times of humility which like Tamar, are life altering and even painfully disgraceful. Though our reputation and honour may be tarnished, our righteousness and virtue before Him is a robe which we are bestowed. He carries in his heart the things we walk through and brings healing. Amy sat like a wee angel beside us while Tim went upstairs to join in Sunday school. I think he has enjoyed having play mates this past week. After church we grabbed a bite at the frinton garden cafe, I ordered a ploughmans lunch so now just need to hunt out a Devonshire tea and a Stilton Cornish pastie, the first I've never tried (clotted cream still awaits my inspection) and the latter I haven't devoured in 11 years. More important than the food was spending time with uncle Ian and aunty beryl, uncle John and aunty val. Will miss their laughter and hugs and wit. Said goodbye to them, then drove to Chelmsford to spend the evening with Sams cousin Phil and wife, Alison and their kids, Hannah and Jack. Alison cooked us a beautiful roast dinner which was so yummy and appreciated. This was followed by bread and butter pudding and treacle tart, custard and cream. I have a new found addiction to Alison's bread and butter pudding. It was perfect. Our kids all ran around in the backyard together happily while we chatted. Phil pulled out a photo album of some photos of young Sam that included one of a Charlie Cahill set in a frame from Poplar. This excited me no end as one of Sams grand fathers was mayor of poplar. I couldn't remember who or which and wished I had my dear friend and ancestory research expert Victoria with me, who helped me find all these facts in the first place! But at least I know that photos are in the family for the book one day I intend to write. To look at, Sam and Phil bear resemblance, and they are even more alike in their personalities. Sam has always talked well of his cousin Phil and I loved seeing why. Alison and Phil met as childhood sweethearts and had dated since they were 14. Such longevity is hard to find and a treasure. Alison is a warm hospitable lady who is also a Sargeant/ trained inspector. Amazing woman. Alison put together a parcel of my favourite and memorable treats... Chocolate, crisps, bassetts jelly babies, cherry drops for Sam, quality street, and even pain au chocolat to bake up for breakfast. I was so moved by her thoughtfulness. I went home with an ache in my chest. People are precious. Sams family is lovely. I will miss having them near.

Hello prince William

Spent some time yesterday walking into frinton village to do some wandering around the second hand stores there. I only had about half an hour, but found a nice jumper and shirt for 3P ach. Thrifting here would be fun. There are at least 4 second hand stores in a 10m square radius and everything is cheap, like hunting for treasure. Sam picked me up and we went and spent a bit more time sea glass hunting. Beautiful weather, in fact, haven't had a single day of rain. Came home and got dressed up to head to Nans 100th party in Clacton. Nans home is right next to the church where the party was being held, so I got to see where Sam spent so much time. Nan looked beautiful. So elegant and gracious. She couldn't remember Sam. But Sam expected that. We wheeled her over to her party, where a large gathering of people came together to celebrate her. A woman who has lived through 2 world wars, her grandmother alive during napoleons time. Her lifetime spans no power and cars, to today. Locked inside her mind are moments in time that would blow our minds. She can't define time so often starts talking as if back then is now.. I watched her with wonder. Now a dear old lady who in some ways is like a small child. Unable to really grasp what all the fuss was about, who had to be quietly told to look up and thank everyone for coming, who smiled and acknowledged us strangers with little awareness of the significance of the occasion... Except that all her years enabled her to carry it off with grace and poise. All the great grandchildren present lined up and walked forward to her in procession to present her with her letter from the queen. It was so moving. We spent the time eating and catching up with family and friends of old, who welcomed me as if I'd always been there. I lost count of the number of times people told us how they did a double take because Sam looks like prince William. That had cracked me up when we visited Buckingham palace. I was taking a photo of Sam outside the gates and noticed a couple of girls stop and stare at him for a moment, trying to figure if it was William. After the party we headed to a restaurant in Weeley to have dinner with family. Sams uncle Ian is so like Sam and when the two of them get together they are an absolute witty crack up. The word play and joking is so funny, very English, a different humour from kiwis. My cheeks hurt from laughing. Will miss being in Sams family immensely. Today were off to church and then to frinton nursery for lunch and then to cousin phil and Alison's place for dinner. I can't wait!

Sand glass

What a fantastic day! We began in Colchester where we found the high street and hit Next for Sam, Tim and Amy. I found a pretty cardi in river island and looked around New Look. Sam showed me around a few of the womans shops, but a wave of reason hit me that I was shopping with no need in mind. So we moved on.
Drove to the secondary school Sam attended in Colchester, which actually doesn't exist anymore.. Now it's a mansion. The old classroom is still there, painted to look like a barn. All I can say is that his school was set in the most enviable quintessential lane. A pond and a meadow in the playground. It's all still there behind a now coded gate and in the old field nw stands a monumental home. Beautiful.
Watching Sams eyes fade off to memories of his childhood melts me. He gets this happy distant look, a youthful twinkle. My heart burns with a longing to cup little Samuels face in my hands and tell him how fantastic he is. Instead I settle to place my hand on grown up Samuels fore arm and tell him how handsome he is. My prince. And I mean it.
Drive home. Took a brief siesta then we headed to frinton seaside. I'd been waiting to walk this with Sam and I wasn't disappointed. The sand is the feel and colour of brown sugar, and instead of shells, it's scattered with pebbles that look like chunks of toffee and caramel. The water has the same hue and the small waves glowed gold. The shores are lined with beach huts. As we walked, I collected sand glass, popping out at me like jewels. The family caught on so we all hunted it out so I can make a piece if art when we get home. As we walked, I quietly talked to Jesus and expressed my gratitude for being here, and like these glass treasures, that He would mark the time here with His presence. He already has but I don't want to miss a moment.
Drove on to Walton and walked the pier where Sam used to fish. Visited his old fishing shop which is still there. Sam has gone to see dan ths evening which gave me a chance t catch up on washing. I even had time to iron! Tomorrow is Nans 100th!!!!!!

Frinton I love you

We spent our last half day in London yesterday at Madame Tussaud's which was okay, Tim found the ride through the centuries and learning about the Black Plague and London fire fascinating. I can't wait to do some homeschooling projects with him on these historical events. We came back to the travelodge and tidied our things and headed via taxi to Picadilly station. Managed with some effort to navigate through the people and maze, with once again, more bags than arms, and no luggage trolleys. Got on the train and headed to heathrow. From there got a hoppa bus to the car hire. In NZ, these events take an hour... It took us 4! Our car hire turned out to be a nice new Peugeot, spacious and smooth. Felt so good to have our own transport again. Sam navigated rush our traffic through heathrow junctions (legend) and we arrived in Cambridge about 7:30pm. We stayed at rectory farm on his aunty and uncles property which is soooo beautiful. Walking into and finding all his family seated and welcoming of us was amazing. I loved seeing them interact and laugh and chat together.. They are all so warm and affectionate.. I love all the kisses and cuddles European culture freely gives. I beamed.. And at times swallowed the lump in my throat that I am here. They set us up in a beautiful room and we slept well. After breakfast today, a quick pool dip, walking around and breathing in fresh air.. then farewells, we drove to waitrose, which was pretty fun!! Found a pile of goodies to stuff into our luggage, books and pretty cake decorations that we can't readily get in NZ, treats and washing liquid, vanish stick etc. From there drove to (drum roll) FRINTON. Watching Sams face come alive as he drove around and memories came flooding back was priceless. When he got to his home church, and pointed out the spot where he used to hang out, tears rolled down my cheeks. To think, that all those years ago that I had been praying for the man who would be my husband and he was on the other side of the world in a pretty seaside town, his family preparing to emigrate to NZ, and thus my husband and I would meet. I thanked god again to be here. We drove past his school where he was head prefect, St. Philamenas, and decided to drop in and see if they would let us see Sams main classroom. We were greeted by the principal who showed us around everywhere. It's such a lovely little school with a godly vision, the kids were respectful and well behaved and I could deeper appreciate Sams fondness of his time there. They asked me about home schooling and gave me some free spare resources to use and I left more inspired than ever at the direction I want to take our kids in their learning. Arrived at our home for the next 5 days, 44 upper fourth ave which just happens, by sheer fluke (Gods care of details) to look into the back yard of the home around the corner, where Sam grew up in!!! Its a 2 level home with a white and pastel blue coastal theme. Love it. Had dinner at Sams best friends house, Dan and Clare. Sam just laughs and grins constantly when walking about them and being with them. A ton of happy and hilarious memories in their time and seeing the cheeky smirk creep over Sams face makes me laugh. Off to bed, tomorrow headed to Colchester to get Sam a shirt and Tim some pants, walk the village, comb the beach for sand glass, photograph the beach huts and hunt through the many antique stores here. Can't wait.

Twinkle toes

Yesterday was epic,.. We just happened to time the day perfectly on many accounts, thank you God for melting me with your love and favour in the little things. We started at Big Ben just in time for the bell to peel out. Tim beamed. It was awesome. We wandered along past the incredible monuments, and arrived at the secured gate of the prime ministers residence, 10 Downing st, just as they opened the gate. That meant we got a view past the armed police right to the front door. Awesome. Then we walked to the horse guards right in time for e changing of the guards. We were so close we could have touched them... Almost did because they started marching towards us with not a word. So much pomp and tradition. I love it. We grabbed a coffee in this awesome little book shop, then walked onto NEXT. Shopped there with semi restraint, found a new top, pants and beautiful accessories. From there we went to Covent Garden and found Skechers. In NZ before we went, Amy discovered with delight Twinkle Toes shoes.. At $90. Ouch. But guess what they had in Skechers... on Tuesdays they have 20 percent off kids shoes, which happened to coincide with our visit. Amy walked in and clealy wasn't leaving without a pair... The rest of the day she spent stamping her feet to watch the lights twinkle. Cute. From there we wandered down to the main markets just as this young opera singer hapenned to be belting out a song. She was incredible. Took a tube to harrods blew my mind at the Christmas displays and food... But most importantly, found for Tim, toy kingdom. Flag the kids, this was my heaven. All the best toys you can imagine on one floor. Tim had some spending money so was majorly excited. We found schleich, half the price of NZ so bought all the new dinosaurs with moving mouths and the smaller ones the boys don't yet have. Can't wait o surprise them when we get home. Tim found Corgo model planes and bought a few of those. I grabbed a box of uk play food for Amy, sort of a memoir to our trip. And a couple of toys for my boys at home who I miss beyond words. On the way out a lady sprayed Sam with a new cologne called Acqua Di Parma. Swoon. I loooooved it. Thankfully Sam did too because I'm so buying him that for his Christmas present. Grabbed some dinner back at travelodge then raced to marks and Spencer's kids to grab a couple of things, including a DIY Emily brown bag. Adorable. Took a bus for a tour of London city but it headed out of the city, and towards South London. We climbed off nonchalantly at a stop and Sam and I pretended to know exactly here we were down these dark streets, clearly in a not so safe area. Ha. Sam and I grinned to each other and were about to admit defeat and grab a taxi, but found a tube and mad our way back to moor gate. Grabbed some treats from Tesco. Slept. Amy wanted to sleep ith her tinkle toes on. When i said she couldnt, she tried to tuck them in beside her, finally managed to convince her they could stay on the bedside unit. cuuuuute. Today were off to Madame Tussaud's and then driving to Cambridge.

Buckingham palace

Started our day yesterday with buffet breakfast. I found little packages of marmite so was super excited... And then upon opening it, declared out loud "for crying out loud you Brits!!" .. Here, it's runny and the colour of caramel and tastes like, we'll, Bovril. Apart from that epic spread failure, yummy breakfast. We headed on the double decker bus to the London tower on the top level. So fun to be up there with mum and dad telling us the historical significance of the buildings. We git off the bus and walked along the waters edge to the tower which i loved. The english grey skies, the gherkin tower, the old monuments which tie through history... Wow. Tower of London was amazing. The ravens, the wire menagerie of animals that lived there.. Including a polar bear!, and the Crown Jewels which still blows my mind. Tim got really upset when we walked through the torture tower, I whisked him out of there but it had reduced him to tears that torture had ever existed. My heart broke with his, and after praying, I talked to him about not loving our lives unto death, standing for a greater cause, and the dispensation of grace God gives us when we need it. He perked up after that and we moved on. Sweet soft hearted boy. From the tower we took the tube to Greenwich to the planetarium and the meridian line. We went to one of the stars and planet shows which was on for school kids. It was an okay show, but I loved most hearing all their little accents piping up with comments and answers and the wee personalities coming out. Then we stood on the meridian line which is the worlds longitudinal 0, where distance and time is measured globally. You put one foot on with side which means your standing in both the east and west hemisphere, and in time, yesterday and today, pretty cool! Headed back to travelodge via marks and Spencer's food store. Oh man... No words, could pretty much live in that store for a few hours. We made our way to the tube and by then it was 4. Sam and I had a Buckingham palace tour anout 5.30. We were tight on time majorly. Left the kids with mum and dad and ran out of the station back to our room, barefoot. Threw on some glam clothes and headed via taxi to the palace. The tour was Unforgettable! We were part of a group of 20 and walked through 19 state rooms slowly, with a guide explaining to us everything. She had worked at the palace for 3 years, so it was awesome to ask her so many questions. We stood on the spot where the William and Kate cut their wedding cake, where Michelle Obama famously hugged the untouchable queen, where the queen herself delivers her Christmas broadcast, where banquets are held. We finished with champagne and the royal store, which was gorgeous. When we were ready to leave we were driven on a buggy out through the main front gates. It was incredible. Took the tube back and Sam and I relived the highlights, pinching ourselves. I crawled into bed an vaguely recall Sam coming in sometime later with a disbelief of America cup results. Being here I realise how kiwi my hubby now is.. He has a kiwi accent and hasn't dropped back to an English one, even in his home country. One more day here and then off to Cambridge to see family. Looking forward to it.