Be Still My Soul ~ Selah ~ Lyrics

Chris Tomlin "All the Way My Savior Leads Me"

In the mud...

I love Philippians 2.

. . Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above
yourselves,  not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:

 Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death - even death on a cross!

Reading it is like hearing a battle cry in my mind, or maybe a cheer of unity, just before the sports players commence action.
It rings out - SERVE OTHERS! Of course! Of course! My spirit cries. When did I ever think that true Godliness and unity and fulfilment would exist outside of anything less than a willingness to serve, love and put first others around me, as an act of worship to a most worthy God.

Yet in reality, living that out is so much harder than the contrite and sweet acts of deference that I sometimes imagine.

Its easy to lay our lives down, when it is esteemed, when its seen, when its encouraged and understood.
But what about when its not. Or what about when its messy. Painful. Costly. What about when it means our reputation is on the line.

Its been my experience that that kind of humility, is the crawling through the mud kind of stuff.

I love the way my pastor once described it. He was talking about being in combat training, literally crawling in the mud, covered in camouflage, with his appointed companion. The only way through, was together. Crawling through the mud, the one in front would carve a path in the ground with his elbows, while the other follows close behind, taking the flicking of mud from the foot of the one in front, in the face. They had to stick together and come out together, or they didnt pass the test. They encouraged each other on. At times, that meant crawling through the most yucky awkward moments, together!

This illustration has never left my mind. Its paints such a striking image of true Christlike humility.

It will ask of you to be put the welfare of others above your own. It will ask of you the courage to get down into the low places along with them and commit to crawling out with them, knowing full well, that unless you come out together, you dont pass. Philippians 2:5.

JR Miller described.. "There is no surer test of the genuineness of Christian life — than in this matter of serving others. In serving others, we should inquire, "Am I like Jesus — or not?" We are too careful of our dignity. When we see the Son of God washing His disciples' feet — we should be ashamed ever to ask whether anything another may need to have done — is too menial for us to do. A king may do the lowliest kindness to the poorest peasant in his realm — and his honor will only be enhanced by it."

In military, you must be prepared to give your life in defense of others. Such heroism is championed on a large scale. But on a small scale, its often missed. Yet, true serving and heroism begins in the little things. But thats where the training really begins! Check out this code of conduct of the US Military.. this should be our Christian code of conduct for everyday life.. "I am a child of God, and I will never surrender of my own free will to the enemy of my soul.. if we are persecuted for doing right, I will keep faith.. I will never be disloyal.. I will trust in my God". GRIT!

How does that grit look in the everyday?
Its ensuring that your conversation and conduct is honorable, even with those closest to you.
Its committing to the good of the corporate, and being willing to walk away, if your being there, would cause the team to lose their focus on the goal
Its being more interested in the lives of those around you, than in your own personal agenda
Its scrimping on the temporal and being extravagent in investing in the eternal  
Its letting purity and Godliness reign in your life, in the hidden person
Its praying and keeping the Word of God at your side always, ready to meet the enemy

Here now in my life, serving means being willing to cook meal after meal. It means willing to get up at the crack of dawn to exercise so I can be ready and fit to serve. It means choosing to have a good attitude regardless of what battles I might be facing. It means being willing to put aside my own social and creative dreams to invest in the things that matter most. It means being willing to take the lowest position, the lesser place, the muddiest route, if by doing so, I can preserve and encourage someone of lesser strength. It means praying for those around me. It means communicating honestly and lovingly with those around me because Im willng to walk the hard yards with them, rather than pull away.

I love what Eric Ludy says "Let the vulnerable claim your strength!"
Since Jesus Christ owns me, He has a claim on my life, energies, and strength. And thusly, those that have a rightful claim on His mercies, grace, and abundance (the poor, the weak, the orphan, the widow, the imprisoned, the refugee, etc) have a claim on me. I am their servant as an extension of my bonded servitude unto my Creator King.

And there is the greatest key of all; Unto my Creator!

Matthew 25:40

  “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me"

 

MISSION Gabriel's Oboe

I was reading this awesome post today.. http://kirkcameron.com/2013/08/create-mission-statement-marriage.

So awesome! I think I could well describe our marriage mission statement, its been 10 years in the refining and ever comes back to the Cross. But I think Sam, the head and leader of our home, would be best fit to articulate that mission. I did pause, however, to stop and consider what my wife mission statement looks like.

For a moment, I felt like I was dreaming of wedding vows again. It thrust me back to ten and a half years ago, and the day Sam and I decided we would attempt writing our wedding vows. Alone with our note pads, we scrawled out words and the purposes of our hearts. We attempted, somewhat youthfully, to articulate the commitment we were making to one another in full. And then we came together again and read our vows out. The truth is, we shed some tears, and laughed some... there were so many words and we had visions of our audience sleeping through it all.. so after all that, we came back to the traditional vows, as we felt that they articulated our own, without, well, so many words.

On our wedding day, I walked down the aisle to Ennio Morricone, Gabriels Oboe, The mission. My mission! To love Samuel James Cahill. We managed to hold back the tears long enough to say our vows with all gusto. Perhaps only Sam and I really understanding how much was behind everything said.

 Ten and a half years on, I think those vows define my mission statement as a wife, more aptly then ever:

Samuel James Cahill, I take you to be my husband
I take your name, I take the honour to be your bride, your prize. And in doing so, I purpose to be one that reflects the vision and nobility of your life- that all who see me, will know that you are a good man, a God fearing man. I purpose to seek Gods Word to live my life to His glory, and in doing so, to esteem Jesus, the champion and cord of who we are. Proverbs 31:23

To have and to hold from this day forward
I give you all that I am and purpose to guard sacredly all that you are. I purpose to care for my body as belonging to you, and to care for yours, and belonging to me. I will guard our intimacy as a secret garden, keeping my deepest emotions and thoughts hidden in Jesus, that it may be a place of beauty and colour for you and you alone.

For better or for worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health
I purpose to be your greatest asset, no matter the circumstances;
to smile in the storm, and let my face warm your day
to keep my voice tender and sweet
to affirm and encourage you with wisdom
to grace our home with faith, peace and joy
to pray for you daily and seek God to be the greatest cheerleader to you
to be industrious with my hands, efficient with my time, and use our resources to His best
to be content with little and with much
to minister to you with all my heart, even when you are unable to return it

To love and to cherish
I purpose to hold the Cross centre of all I am, all I do, and to love you unconditionally, as He has loved me, I purpose to create in our marriage a place of flourishing and life. To seek God with all my heart, that our marriage will nourish you, and be a place for you to grow in the Lord. I purpose to hold nothing back from you, to allow Gods Word to create in me a place where every delicacy is held for you. Song of Songs 7:13

As long as we both shall live
As long as I am alive, my love, I will count it my greatest honour, my highest mission and calling, to be Mrs. Samuel Cahill... and then let there be no more me.. just Jesus you see.

I love you.
Always,
Your flower.
Fleur

Did not our hearts burn?

One of my favourite passages of scripture is in Luke 24. The Road to Emmaus.
Two men on a road discussing everything that hapenned with Jesus just being crucified. Everytime I read this next line, the hairs on my arms stand up.. "As they talked and discussed these things with each other, Jesus himself came up and walked along with them".

As I sat to read and spend time with the Lord this afternoon, the words kept jumping out at me "come to me". It wasnt some half hearted call of small engagement. It was a beckoning of my soul for complete and surrendered reliance on Him.

How does that reliance actually look? I could not word it any better than Oswald Chambers; 
"We step right out with recognition of God in some things, then self consideration enters our lives and down we go.. the things surrounding you are real, but when you look at them you are immediately overwhelmed, and even unable to recognize Jesus... you will only recognize His voice more clearly through recklnessness - being willing to risk your all."

Many times upon the road of my walk with Jesus, I have failed, like the two men headed to Emmaus, to see and recognize my Saviour walking beside me. I can identify with their sense of dissapointment, loss, confusion. My preoccupation with how I think things ought to have gone. v.21 "but (I) had hoped"

I vividly remember a time my expectation of how God might show up, was so challenged. It was weeks before my exams were looming and I know nervous trepidation was filling me. Perhaps having it drilled into me that my whole life course was held on the hinge of my academic success, had something to do with it. But I had been praying and I just wanted the Lord to speak. One evening, my parents asked me to join them for dinner with a couple in ministry, who had a son a little younger than me, who was down syndrome. This wasnt how I wanted to spend a potential study evening, or make new friends either, but I decided to honour my parents. I politely engaged in conversation throughout the evening and towards the end of the evening, I got into a small conversation with this guy. Not knowing anything about my circumstances, he suddenly told me "I feel God wants to tell you..." and proceeded to speak into my life. What he said, was clearly from the Lord, and changed me forever. From that day on, I decided, to never pre-judge the means and measures which God would choose to speak to me. 

I still need to remind myself however. 

Because circumstances dont always look how I thought they might look. And the ways in which Jesus speaks to me, arent the ones I would expect. Sometimes the disruptions, the inconvenient phone calls, the broken routine, the small, mundane, tiring, unglamourous, perplexing, emptying moments, are the very means by which Jesus chooses to reveal Himself to me.. where heavenly victory is forged. And He calls me not to question what He is up to..  but to be recklessly abandoned to the knowing that He is God.

Like the two men on the road to Emmaus, when the Word and truth soaks into my being, and I align my heart with the truth, there is communion. v31. "Then their eyes were opened and they recognized him"
They asked each other: “Were not our hearts burning within us while he talked with us on the road and opened the Scriptures to us?”

Dont you just hunger to know that burning? That fresh knowing that He is RIGHT HERE! The revelation of His Word in your life, real. More real than than anything. More real than your understanding of what the present circumstances could possibly mean.

He wants that for us. But it requires of us that we are willing to more than just wander a little down the road and ponder what we see. Ecclesiasted 11: ⁴ He who watches the wind will not sow and he who looks at the clouds will not reap. ⁵ Just as you do not know the path of the wind and how bones are formed in the womb of the pregnant woman, so you do not know the activity of God who makes all things.

Dont look at the ground, or the signs of things around you, for a measure of how recklessly abandoned YOU should be to what God is speaking to you. Move forward, and know He is going to meet you. You will know He is there... your heart will burn within you.

All I Ask

Radiant

The other night, my eldest 9yr old son remarked that a storm was going to hit Tauranga. Not one for accuracy, he had overestimated the weather report. Still it was obviously enough to instill fear in my little 6yr old son, Ben, even though he didnt say anything.

The following morning, Ben appeared, he blinked his eyes open "hey mum, the tornado didnt ruin anything". We laughed together, I told him it had barely even rained.

He then told me how he had a dream that night. That a tornado was going to hit our home. I stopped in my tracks when he said "but there was a man in our house. He was big like daddy, no bigger than daddy, he was like daddy but it wasnt him. He wasnt one of us. He even let me snuggle him whenever I liked.   Here he paused, as his eyes lit up and his face glowed.. and he continued... and he kept our house safe. The house creaked a little, but it was fine" and off he went to pour himself rice bubbles.

But I, I could barely hold the lump in my throat. I blinked back through tears.

Imagine. Imagine a father that never minded you to climb onto your lap for snuggles, never minded you to seek comfort.. that was there for you, no matter how big and scary the storm outside.

And we have that Father!

God spoke to not just Ben, but to me. The accummulation of 'stuff' lately for me has felt tiring. I have felt my soul beginning to cower, diving for cover, trembling of the threatening storm. Its not one thing, just an amass of little things that mount up to a ominous weather report, hand delivered to my door by Satan himself.

The unfamiliarity of his knock is disguised by the messengers he sent earlier, to distract me. Im too busy weighing up how accurate the accusations of undeservedness are, that were thrown against me, to consider if his foreboding message is true. Surely, I tell myself, I have allowed and brought upon myself . Its me. If I could only do this, or do that, better, I would better have control of life?

Joy seeps out of my life, robbed from me with every accusation that the enemy drives in further.

So it was yesterday morning that I whispered to Jesus "can I climb on your lap?"

You know what he replied ;
"I sought the Lord, and he answered me;
    he delivered me from all my fears. 
 Those who look to him are radiant;
    their faces are never covered with shame."

You know, the enemy will always drive us to look inside ourselves. Occupied by our complete inadequacy, we either get sidelined by fighting back to prove ourselves, or in drawing away in hate of who we are.
The answer to the storms in our lives, is never that we need to try to muster some internal change or attempt a renovation of our circumstances. Right in the midst of it, He lifts our eyes heavenward.. and there, and there only, is a security. And what marks me? RADIANCE! No accusation sticks, no shame, no fear, no measuring of who I am... but a life that reflects Him! 

Just like my favourite story "You are Special" by Max Lucado, the stars and dots dont stick. And all that matters is that we know we are His.